Helping or Enabling? Al-Anon Can Help

March 26, 2018

Loving an Alcoholic

If you love someone who abuses alcohol, you want more than anything to help that person. Read on to ensure the help you are providing isn’t causing more suffering and visit Al-Anon to take the quiz.

Making Excuses

Have you ever made excuses or lied to protect your loved one’s behavior from being discovered? If so, Al-Anon can teach you how to avoid enabling your alcoholic. Have you ever…

Made excuses for why they missed work or social events?
Lied about how they lost a job or about legal troubles?
Cleaned up after him or her, literally or figuratively?
Smoothed over tense situations they caused or played the peacemaker?
Put them to bed or helped them undress?
Solved their financial or legal problems?
Picked them up or bailed them out of jail?
Loaned them money or paid their bills?
Sacrificed your own needs, job, plans, happiness, peace, well-being?

The Al-Anon slogan, “Live and Let Live” teaches us to let our alcoholics live their lives so we can live ours.

Helping or Hurting

If you’ve done any of the above, you may be hurting more than helping. When you constantly solve his or her problems, your alcoholic has no incentive to change behavior. The addict is not faced with the responsibility or the consequences of their behaviors. Reciting Al-Anon’s Serenity Prayer can help you find peace.

Changing Your Behavior

The first action you can take to support your alcoholic is to change your own behavior. Al-Anon can teach you to love in a new way, one that doesn’t support the destructive behavior of addiction. It’s not easy, but through the 12 Steps of Al-Anon, you can take it “One Day At A Time”.

Find an Al-Anon Meeting

Al-Anon has free and supportive meetings all across the country. Find an Al-Anon meeting here

D’Amore Healthcare is a dual diagnosis and substance abuse addiction treatment center in Orange County, CA.

We provide information and treatment for people dealing with the life-shattering cycle of mental illness and addiction.
If someone needs immediate help, call us 24 hours a day at 714.375.1110 or contact us online.

Edited For Accuracy By:

Jennifer Carpenter

Jennifer is a Certified Treatment Executive (CTE) and holds credentials in the behavioral health field to include certifications as a Qualified Mental Health Specialist and a Certified Admissions and Marketing Specialist with CCAPP.

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D'Amore Healthcare

4.5

Stephen Sumney

17:34 25 Jun 24

I was suicidal when admitted. Although I have lent complete the program yet I’m compelled yo write a review.Sweet and brief: I cannot express clearly with words how impressed I have been with every single person affiliated with the program. Top to bottom you will find genuine, caring people all with great smiles.Just the other day I described to my therapist Paul my feelings that “I’ve had some of the best days of my life” in their care!As strange as that might sound it’s the absolute truth. I feel like I’m being reincarnated into the person inside me that’s been hurt and hiding for a lifetime.I’m so grateful for the personal discoveries!Stephenread more

Eric Schroeder

18:37 15 May 24

I can't say how grateful my family is for this wonderful organization. Last fall a family member was in very bad shape on a number of levels (mental health, addiction), and hit rock bottom. We were referred to D'Amore. A crisis team came out to help us late on a Thursday night. Our loved one agreed to go to treatment. Friday afternoon D'Amore sent a team to bring them to their facility (they helped pack whatever was needed, clothing, etc, and assured them it's a safe place, and allayed their anxiety). What happened over the next few months was amazing. The entire staff is very professional, and really cares.read more

Levi Ares

17:26 14 Mar 24

With the proper commitment to positive growth, D’Amore is a place that WILL give you the necessary education, guidance, grace, and support to set you up for success. When looking for programs, my family was recommended D’Amore from two separate unaffiliated programs. As someone who has been to other programs, within my first few days I knew change was going to happen and STAY consistent as long as I did the work. I cannot praise the program and staff enough for how life changing my experience was. If you are ready for the help, D’Amore is the place to receive it.read more

Michele Loftin

21:07 15 Aug 23

I cannot say enough good things about D’Amore Healthcare. My daughter attended their program Spring of 2023 and the results have been truly life changing. She had been to numerous treatment facilities in the past but none of them produced the amazing results D’Amore did. From our first contact with the staff, I could tell how caring and knowledgeable they all were. My phone calls and texts were always returned and all my questions and concerns were promptly and professionally handled. My daughter talks very highly about the treatment and care she received there. I wish we would have found them years ago but will forever be thankful for their help.read more

Avery Paton

18:15 25 May 23

I went here around 3 months ago at age 20 for 35 days with severe depression and anxiety, hopeless that I could ever change or get better. Now, however, I feel like it's safe to say that my brain was literally rewired. My old ways of thinking changed andtreatment started me fresh, from square one. The daily education on mental health really helped too and I feel more introspective and more myself than ever. I have new, healthy ways to cope with my anxiety. My life was literally turned around for the better. This almost feels like the beginning of my life, especially now that I see that it's worth living again. Thank you D'Amore.read more

Maricela Marshall

17:17 13 Oct 22

I was excited for my son to be joining D'Amore Healthcare. We arrived early morning and were greeted with open arms and our son was given breakfast. After my husband and I had a brief meeting with regard to what to expect from the program and if we had any questions, we were off and also taken care of with treats to keep us on our travels back home. Thank you D'Amore for your commitment to families that are wanting the best for their loved ones.read more

Marta Brown

05:29 22 Sep 22

This is a great place to go if you don’t have any gender dysphoria because they will refuse to call you by anything but your legal name. So cis people would probably find this treatment great, but trans people not so much! I wanted to rate it more like a 3.5/5 but had to round up to 4 :) I do go by my birth name now but still am a proud member of the LGBTQ community. I went here a couple years ago though so hopefully things have changed since then as far as chosen names and pronouns go!read more

Jeff Arimond

20:12 12 Sep 22

As a Sound Bath and Yoga practitioner for D'Amore I am very impressed with the care and love our staff gives to each and every client. Having been involved with recovery programs for many years, it is a pleasure to see such a high level of involvement within this caring facility here at D'Amore.read more

Nancy Vy

03:30 02 Sep 20

My son spent about 2 months in his healing journey at D’Amore. The amazing staffs from intake to discharge gave nothing but amazing support. D’Amore was the stepping stone to his healing and coping with schizoaffective condition. He was treated with care and as a mom, I felt very comfortable throughout his time there. I am that parent who has a million questions and voice concerns. And each person I reached out to made me felt confident he was in good hands. Communication was key and D’Amore was great with responding and providing updates. My son made great progress in the short time he was there. I would recommend any one needing a little extra help, to consider them for your healing.read more

Lauri Braudrick

16:37 11 Aug 20

My son went to D'Amore and the staff was so wonderful and compassionate. I did a lot of research prior and was happy that I picked them. They make the process very easy. Sharissa is fabulous and really helped make experience wonderful. Thank you!read more

Steve Klein

19:46 10 Mar 20

D'Amore provided our 18-year old son with the care and support he needed during a very difficult time. The support provided during his 6-week stay was very effective. His assigned therapist was excellent and provided the appropriate personalized care and treatment he needed. I would recommend D'Amore to others.read more

Donnette Alexander-Jeffers

21:32 10 Jan 20

I wasn't sure what to expect when I was told that I needed assistance from a residential facility. The thought of being in a residential facility was intimidating. I am so glad I had the opportunity to go to D'Amore. The staff were caring, concerned, kind, and dedicated to helping me get better. Celebrating victories with house members and BHAs as well as working through things that looked like defeats (in individual and group therapy) was the support I truly needed to move forward.The psychiatrist, his assistant, and the nurse took great care to make sure that the medication I was receiving was actually effective and moving me in the right direction.The implementation of a schedule and the need to adhere to it were so helpful in assisting me to get back into a routine. I am beyond thankful for morning wakeup, daily activities, and lights out. My life had become so far from normal in terms of daily routine, that this was a huge help in transitioning me back into a productive and healthy lifestyle once I left D'Amore.The desire to help and care doesn't stop once you leave. The staff continues to be available for encouragement and assistance. They truly want to see you succeed beyond your stay in the facility.What looked like the worst thing in the world to me, when I was told I would have to stay in a residential facility for 6 weeks, became one of the greatest blessings in my recovery.I'm truly thankful to D'Amore for the help they provided.read more

Ann Amaral

21:41 08 Jan 20

I highly recommend these folks- they tailored a specific program to help my daughter and she loved her time with them. They are very caring professionals.read more

Courtney Nickels

22:27 06 Jan 20

I was a patient at D’amore back in May 2019. To be honest I probably would have died if I didn’t make the leap to go in-patient somewhere. I chose D’amore because of how “home-like” it seemed and the fact that it wasn’t like a hospital number one and number two because of reviews. Once I got there I was terrified because I was leaving home, my three kids and husband. Day 2 another girl showed up and we clicked. It was nice having someone right along with me. The house was super clean and nice. Easy to follow program and great staff. Everyone is pulling for you and are there with a shoulder to cry on (which I did a lot). If you’re needing an in-patient facility to go to consider D’amore.read more

Lauren Danielle

23:53 03 Jan 20

D'Amore was an amazing place. I was treated with kindness and compassion. I never felt like I was being ignored or was a nuisance. They took the time to care for me, especially when I couldn't care for myself. For those who need this care, there is no better place.read more

Berkeley Bennett

01:55 17 Oct 19

D'Amore honestly changed my life. The staff/therapists/clinical are all amazing people that truly care about each individual. They gave me the tools to change the way I see the world. They never gave up on me and I cannot thank them enough.read more

Max Block

22:51 04 Oct 19

D’Amore Healthcare led me to a path of recovery. I am so grateful to the entire staff for being patient with me and my mental health issues. I will always remember the lessons I learned in the time spent at their facilities. UPDATE: Thanks to the wonderful staff at D'Amore, I was able to recover from something as scary as schizo-affective disorder. I am now a functioning member of society with a full time job and many friends in recovery. I'm not sure where I would be without this facility, but most likely dead or in a long-term psych ward. Chris is an amazing counselor who I knew cared about me. Joe, my therapist, helped me with my delusions, depression, and serious anxiety. Blaine was a lead technician when I was there and was extremely friendly and downright amazing at crisis intervention. Jennifer was able to convince me to come to treatment and start a new life. Thank you D'Amore, without treatment centers like yours, the world would be a much darker place.read more

Sarah Murrin

18:03 27 Sep 19

The services at D’Amore are top-notch. They’ve helped me for years and years to come. The staff are knowledgeable, receptive, and trustworthy. Thank you to everyone in the D’Amore family for changing lives one day at a time.read more

Scott Hurst

15:25 13 Aug 19

After receiving treatment from many other facilities, D’Amore, by a very large margin, far exceeds what others offer and provide. The staff, clinicians and doctors are far superior and are on top of the needs of all patients at all times.In my opinion, D’Amore is the place to come for a great start at recovery. Thank you D’Amore!read more

michael jann

04:04 02 Jul 19

My son did great there. I don't know how else to say it, but I feel like they saved a life... maybe more than one, if you know what I mean. I'll never forget the night I called them, scared to death, and Jennifer talked me both down, and up, into hope. And they delivered what they promised.read more

tim harris

06:16 06 Jun 19

Just as with any other illness, mental health and addiction had left my family with wounds which we were near helpless in healing ourselves. D’Amore Healthcare played a crucial role in our recovery process through it’s informative staff, caring technicians, and knowledgeable clinicians. After dealing with numerous other facilities, it is clear that D’Amore’s approach to tackling the multifaceted problem of mental illness is superiorly effective. Thank you D’Amore!read more

Pacific Solstice Behavioral Health

02:00 29 Mar 19

I have been working in the behavioral health field for 15 years. It is so rare to really feel supported and connected with a referral partner or when referring a client for care outside of your facility.It truly takes a village for us to help those in need and our friends and partners at D’Amore are an exemplary example of clinical excellence, client care, and collaboration!Thank you Team D'Amore Healthcare for helping us provide the absolute best care for our clients and their family members.Sincerely,Doc, Tom, Rachel, and the Pacific Solstice Behavioral Health family.read more

Benjamin Smith

00:57 06 Mar 19

I have been an employee since 2016 and want to share my experience with D'Amore Healthcare. It is a very supportive environment for employees and opportunities abound here for those who want to blaze a new path for themselves! Because of the industry we are in it is a challenging work environment at times but it's remarkably stimulating and there is all the encouragement one could possibly ask for to help in meeting and surmounting those challenges so that one can reach their goals and leave work each day feeling they had made a positive difference. I have worn several hats at this company, both working with patients and working in the office, both overnight and during the day. I have always felt supported in everything I have tried to do, from the CEO and other Administration all the way down, and anytime I have been open with them about my needs they have worked with me in a way no other employer ever has to help me thrive despite whatever challenges may develop. I will forever be grateful for the opportunities I have been given here. Learning how to meet new challenges in a career is always an ongoing process, and I still have much to learn, but I am confident that I will continue to be shown the support and help that I've always found here.read more

Heather Saunders

01:00 01 Mar 19

D'Amore helped me in many ways it helped me build my confidence and learn skills to help me though my psychiatric problem and craving to feed my addiction I think my experience with the staff was amazing they challenged me when I was holding back and praised my accomplishments I am grateful I had the experience of getting help from this place I am still working on staying clean I have not given up I just keep going. I have a job now too I also got help from them to get treatment after I finish at D'Amore I really appreciate that because I'm doing very well right now.read more

Heather Saunders

01:00 01 Mar 19

Benjamin Smith

02:02 28 Feb 19

Thomas Ternus

23:37 29 Jan 19

D'Amore changed my life. I have been to many other treatment facilities and D'Amore takes the cake. The staff are very friendly and attentive to your needs. The substance abuse education is top notch, and individual therapy sessions are very thorough. I am a better husband and father thanks to D'Amore, thank you to you all.read more

david demille

03:41 10 Jan 19

As a clinician who works in treatment, I appreciate the fine work of D'Amore. The care and support they provide to their clients is excellent. I hear from some of their past clients who consistently speak highly of the quality of their program and staff. They are a credit to the field of mental health and substance abuse treatment!read more

Sulabha Abhyankar

19:15 09 Jan 19

As a professional in the recovery behavioral health field for over 30 years, I would absolutely recommend D’Amore Healthcare. When referring patients, I know that they will receive the best care for primary mental health treatment, as well as detoxification and dual diagnosis/substance abuse treatment. D’Amore delivers kindness, structure and hope to their patients 24 hours a day and the individualized, 1:1 attention they provide to each patient allows them to grow as empowered individuals. The treatment team is amazing and the program is dynamic while integrating today’s best practices to provide the best care to their patients.read more

Meg Wheeler

05:13 07 Jan 19

I came to work at D'Amore in September 2017. At the time I was strongly against working in an inpatient setting due to standard poor treatment of individuals while in this level of care. I was convinced-due to past experience-all residential settings were the same. D'Amore proved me wrong on day one and continues to prove me wrong each and every day. Starting from management and administration, staff are constantly trained and reminded to be compassionate, empathetic, and kind, and they truly embody these attributes. We are also treated well as employees, which is part of the reason why the love for those in our care is so genuine. I am thankful for everything D'Amore continues to provide me with everyday. We all truly care for your loved ones as if they were our own. We will keep doing this amazing work!read more

Ivy Moon

07:40 06 Jan 19

D’Amore Healthcare was an absolute blessing for our family! My husband needed mental health treatment and I came across D’Amore Healthcare. Jennifer in the office was amazing, so patient and caring for the needs of my husband (and still is!). She got him admitted right away and assured me D’Amore was the right place for him to treat his needs. The 30-day program he was in was rough on our family, but so worth the treatment he received. He came out a better person, better father, and better husband!He still struggles at times with his mental health, but the program has given him the tools to overcome it and not let it overcome him. He’s also been attending the alumni meetings which help him with additional therapy and regain confidence in himself. I know my husband thanks the program for his treatment, but I thank D’Amore for giving me my husband back!read more

KAREN JAFFE

20:35 18 Dec 18

D’Amore is saving my granddaughter’s life! She has mental illness problems and drug addiction. She has been to 2 addiction rehabs, 1 other co-occurring rehab and now D’Amore. The other co-occurring place did very little to help her mental illness and they ended up kicking her out. D’Amore has worked so hard on both of her problem areas and have never given up on her. The staff is exceptional and they really do care! My beautiful granddaughter has told me, “Nana, This is the first place I feel comfortable in so I have opened up and talked about bad things that have happened in my life. Stuff I have never told anyone, not even you.” I cried when she said that because I know she’s on her way to recovery. I have to thank Jennifer, Kristen, Erin, Drew and all of the staff (I can’t remember everyone’s name.) D’Amore, you are in my prayers to continue saving women and men. God Bless you all!read more

Chantal Lessard

00:11 04 Dec 18

D’Amore has been so incredible with helping men and women who struggle with depression, anxiety, PTSD, trauma, etc. I work in the recovery field and we have sent clients who we thought were primary substance abuse but ended up showing signs of needing a primary mental health facility and have come back to us stable and happy and ready to become productive members of society. We are so grateful that there is a safe place out there that we can trust with saving our clients lives. The staff goes above and beyond and they do amazing clinical work.read more

Michael Yamashiro

20:37 28 Nov 18

I am the program manager at D'Amore Healthcare and couldn't be more proud of the work we do here. Each staff member at D'Amore comes into shift with an open heart and mind. We never judge or stigmatize, instead we empathize and educate. Having co-workers that believe in this framework, ensures that patients are approached with dignity and respect. Working at a company that values human dignity and emphasizes this approach is not only refreshing, but empowering. We are making differences in peoples lives here. The work is not easy, but with dedicated and knowledgeable staff, change is possible.read more

Ailana Saria Donato

18:58 26 Nov 18

Working at D'Amore Healthcare is such a fulfilling experience. One thing I admire about the company is that D'Amore Healthcare values self-care, which makes sense as how can we (staff) share love and care to our patients if we can't provide that for ourselves first? Another thing I admire is the constant checks and balances. We make sure that we are on top of everything we do. Lastly, it makes my heart smile when not only patients say, "This is WAY DIFFERENT from the previous places I've been!", but staff mentioning this as well. It's such a blessing to work at D'Amore Healthcare and watch people grow and bloom from day 1.read more

Michael Yamashiro

22:54 23 Nov 18

Joshua Saurbier

01:21 20 Nov 18

I was here for 60 days and it was a great experience. I Learned a lot They have a really good clinical team they does groups and individual therapy. Also you get to go on outings Things like the gym,meetings the park. There is a chef that cooks really amazing food every night for dinner. The staff is all very nice they do their job and listen when you need to talk, specially Julie she was really helpful and amazing at her jobread more

Jim Gane

21:59 19 Nov 18

A family member of mine wet in for mental health care. The facility, the staff, the treatment were all quite beneficial. Working with office and finance staff was quite easy and helpful as well!read more

Alexandra Stuart

01:40 14 Nov 18

If you're looking of short-term care, D'Amore is the place to go! The staff are kind, compassionate, and honest. They work to relate to you, and are people you can turn to. You get a chef prepared dinner every night- and the Chef is an awesome human being as well as a great human being. If structure is what you seek, this is the place for you. It can take a bit of reminding sometimes if you make a request, so your stay will provide an excellent opportunity to learn to advocate for yourself!! I felt community and belonging here. I learned to start trusting again. The staff truly cares about their clients and you can feel it. You may feel stifled and overprotected, but when you leave the world seems a bit colder. D'Amore lives up to it's name as well as it's denote 'foundling'; an abandoned infant discovered and cared for by others. You WILL find a sense of home and family here!!read more

Elizabeth Stipher

20:55 24 Oct 18

As a professional in the recovery field, I wholeheartedly recommend D’Amore Healthcare as one of the top and most trusted primary mental health and dual diagnosis treatment programs in the recovery community today. D’Amore takes great pride in their Build Me Up program which fosters behavioral and cognitive change through gracious redundancy of positive reinforcement, meditative work (a program focused on recalibrating the circadian rhythm), intensive group work and interdisciplinary treatment team as well as their conservative, phased approach to medication. D’Amore offers engaging outings that challenge the patient's on a daily basis, individualized treatment plans and nutritious chef prepared meals that cater to those with special dietary needs. D'Amore is a professional yet nurturing and warm environment.read more

Donnie Moon

13:22 22 Aug 18

I was a patient at D'Amore for 30 days. Over those 30 days, I participated in the best treatment program and made lasting relationships that I'll never forget.If you suffer from mental-health, dependency or substance abuse issues, D'Amore can help. I've personally witnessed countless patients enter the program a figment of their past selves, and conclude the program a completely changed (for the better) individual. Able to re-enter the world a changed, more confident self. Myself being one of them.I owe a great deal to this program. I have found the tools and gained the knowledge to overcome my mental-health concerns while in treatment here. The staff is first-class, the activities are fun and engaging, the environment safe and clean, and group therapy really helps conquer whatever it is you're dealing with.There is zero doubt, I made the right decision to seek help at D'Amore. Thank you D'Amore, and thank you Erin, and Jennifer for your continued support! Even after treatment.read more

Renee Ritter

21:00 03 Aug 18

Everything from different types of groups to the atmosphere, to meeting with the psychiatrist made D'Amore unlike any other mental health care facility that I have ever been to. Dr El was honestly the best psychiatrist. I feel like he really listened to me as an individual rather then just another patient and that made me feel so much more comfortable every time I met with him. I love all the medical staff which were very helpful and always educated me on my medications and checked up on me to make sure I was doing well. I can't thank D'Amore enough for giving me that extra love and attention I needed to bring myself back from the dark place I was in. Thank you again so much D'Amore!!!read more

J.D. W

20:48 29 Jun 18

D’Amore – What a blessing! From in-take to discharge – great experience. In a time of need, they have gone above & beyond to assist our family, provide lifelong tools, answer questions, explain everything in great detail & have wonderful medical care. Each & every staff member, I have been in contact has been kind & compassionate willing to help & guide me through each situation. The staff is knowledgeable, organized, qualified professionals that show genuine concern for each patient. The facilities are clean, well-organized, great food & are a safe environment. D’Amore thank you for all of your help, we wouldn’t be where we are today, with out you all.read more

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